Stark Naked in Switzerland

STARK NAKED IN SWITZERLAND

BROOKE & WILHELM GENN | THE NOMADIC NEWLYWEDS

After a brisk, (read: FREEZING), sunrise hike in the Bernese Alps we are ready to relax and be rejuvenated – Thankfully the crisp weather isn’t the only refreshing thing here in Adelboden. The wellness spa welcomes us with warm, open arms (whilst it’s hands are filled with hot herbal tea, mmm!). Relatively speaking, we aren’t high maintenance – Here they offer treatments from blackberry wraps to alpine herb massages  – All we want is to warm up…take a dip in the serene, outdoor hot pool all whilst gazing out upon the vast, enchanting mountain range. Cool thing is – around here, that isn’t too much to ask!   As we head off to our respective changing rooms, it feels as though the floors, the walls, even the glowing wall sconces have been steeped in lavender and eucalyptus – as if the entire spa were created from an organic matter infused with natural, tranquil aromas.   The calm and quiet spa attendant takes us through the options available to us, recommending that we try the rain shower and the steam bath. She guides us to a beautiful wooden area enclosed by a steamy glass door adorning cautionary labels. She breezes through as if it’s completely commonplace…   “Oh and here, as in all European spas, no clothes are permitted whatsoever….” She goes on to talk about which type of mud-mask she recommends… In the States, it’s “No shirt. No service.” Up here, we’ve got a sticker on the door of a bra, and one of a pair of men’s shorts…both of which have a “no smoking” style strike through them! Well I’ll be darned – I think I’m Mrs. Adventurous ’til someone says the adventure must be done naked…in a public, co-ed place.   Briefly, I wonder if I’m really just a Midwestern wallflower after all.   Today, we are proving that ‘Bashful’ is not a part of our vocabularies. I’m not even sure what the intent of a Finnish sauna is, but challenge accepted! Off go the robes. Right here in the middle of the spa. Folks in the serenity room are in athletic gear, stretching their arms out in yoga-like fashion and those in the rain shower have only left their towels outside and are surely dressed to some degree.   And here we are. Stark naked.   Now, to see your spouse naked is normal and lovely. A perk of the job, one might say. BUT, to see them naked in public is an odd experience. Not good nor bad. Just. Plain. Odd. I’ve impressed even myself with this strange (mis)adventure…and though we are admittedly hoping no one else is within the wooden box as we heedfully inch the door open, we do in fact venture in.   The coast is clear – No nude Europeans frolicking about. Just two crazy Americans.